Like Venus and Mars
by Omgjelloz
Summary: Sometimes when two opposites are forced together, it just must might be enough to make them attract.  A collection of serious and comedic Ilanca Drabbles.
1. The Legend of Sanitation

**Drabble 1: The Legend of Sanitation**

The princess groaned in utter disdain. She had never- and she meant EVER- been forced into cleaning a sanitary device in her life. And to make matters worse, she had absolutely NO clue on how to accomplish the given task at hand.

Her adversary grinned, slyly leaning his back against the ledge of the doorway. And he couldn't help but doing so. Something about seeing his sworn royal heir suffer made him smile. It was almost like a game to the corporal, and victory on the rare occasion never failed to amuse him.

"So, Princess, how does it feel to be a MAID?"

The furious tension finally broke out from inside the girl, and she yanked the toilet brush out of the hole, launching it at the corporal's face. The device scratched his cheek, enshrouding it in its sanitary fluid. The boy gagged as the repulsing taste fell upon his tongue. Only God knew what the heck that concoction beheld.

He coughed for a moment or so before attempting to regain his posture. He flashed an infuriated look at the girl.

"WELL, EXCUSE ME, PRINCESS!"

The boy stormed out of the room without another moment's hesitation, inaudibly flinging insults back at her. He entered his room and slammed the door.

And no thanks to his own intimidation, it broke from its hinges, falling to the floor.

"Oh…GREAT!"

Ilana smiled. Sometimes, even with every failure, there was an ultimate victory in the end.

**To anyone reading my Adventure Time (**_**Paper Hearts**_**) or Avatar fanfictions (**_**How I Came to be**_**): Okay, so I either misplaced the USB or it's on my computer, but I'm about half way through The third chapter of **_**How I Came to Be**_**. (Maybe with some luck, I'll actually finish it tonight or in the next few nights.) As for the Adventure Time fanfic, I have the next chapter planned out, I just haven't written it out yet. XD (But I promise you, it's coming! ;D).**


	2. One and the Same

**Drabble 2: One and the Same**

Ilana sulked, starring down from the balcony. It had been two months since their departure.

Two months since she had last seen her father.

Two months since she had left him for dead.

The poor girl fell helplessly to her knees. Her heart had shattered on the ground, and she was too weak to pick it up. She shook harder with each falling tear and the agonizing pain that came with it. She tried to hide her self- alleged sins behind her hands, but it was no use. She was a murderer to her people…

…to her father.

Lance stood watching from behind. He hindered, unsure of how to react to the given situation. Half of him wanted to merely reach out and hold the girl. In a way, though vague, he could relate. But the other half pulled him back by the emotionless shield that haunted him.

Ilana clenched her hand, attempting to wipe a tear away as she pulled it from her face.

"You probably think I'm so weak right now. I'm supposed to be a symbol of hope for my people. And just look at me. I'm pathetic."

Lance took in a long sigh, fully aware of the advance that he was about to make towards her.

"I know how you feel."

The girl glanced up at him momentarily. An expression of puzzlement had been sketched upon her face. The boy shuffled his feet, trying to shake away the queer nature in his comment.

"Well…not fully. But, I do know how it feels to be alone… without him."

The tears resurged, and the princess broke down a second time, hiding her face within her hands once again.

The corporal closed his eyes.

He took one step forward.

Then another.

Ilana felt her hands slowly being lifted away. She looked up. His magnificent eyes gleamed before the girl as he kneeled before her, shinning with the open moonlight dancing upon them. They were so beautiful. So bright, but yet so dark…

"Ilana, you're an amazing young woman, and don't you forget that. Sometimes…we think that it's all in vain, that we'd rather be dead than to be without them. But know that you're blessed. Your father was always there for you. Thank God for that."

Ilana stared dumbfound for a moment. The soldier had never said anything in that spectrum of heartfelt emotion before. But she knew he was talking of something beyond that. He was talking of his father. And she knew that deep down inside, it tortured the boy beyond any perceivable. It was the source of all his pain; why he acted the way he did. She remembered once hearing of a story (though more as a legend) told by the Earthly humanoids. It spoke of a man and a woman whose one sin had condemned all of mankind for an eternity, where each humanoid was cursed to be born flawed by their actions…unjustly.

Lance was like that.

He closed his eyes, feeling her hands so perfectly intertwined in his as they rested upon his lap. He had never opened up to anyone. Ever. But now the corporal could hear the young girl's call. She had opened the door and was crying for him to enter. And for the first time in his life:

He did.

Lance took a final breath.

"He was never there for me. And…he didn't even care. When I was little, I would sometimes run up to him and say, 'I love you, Daddy!' He would just walk away. It was as if he couldn't even hear me. But other times…"

Lance could feel a tear as it slipped down his cheek.

"Sometimes he would come home from work angry. Angry that no one would listen to him; angry that no one had ever even tried to believe his propositions. So he would take it out on me. One day there was screaming, the next, I would wake up still bleeding from the night before. I was afraid. But I still wanted him."

At last, Lance looked up at the girl. He watched as her eyes gleamed in agonizing guilt for both him and the assumptions that she had previously made. And then…

He broke.

"And he left. He left without even saying GOODBYE! And do you _know _what his last words were to me? "Get out of me way, YOU LITTLE SHIT!' The next thing I know, I hear that he killed General Modula, the most worshipped general on our _whole_ planet, along with himself in some damn experiment. And _I _was left with the blame. People hated _me _because of him! I WAS NEVER EVEN GIVEN THE CHANCE!"

It was done.

Lance shook vigorously as the tears streamed down. He had finally said it. After all these years, he was free.

Ilana wrapped her arms around him, holding him tight as she tried to comfort the boy along with herself.

"Lance, I'm _so _sorry…"

The corporal felt her soft tears fall upon his shoulder. He remained in a state of awe for a moment or so, trying to decipher the passion she so eagerly displayed towards him.

He smiled, gently returning her embrace.

It was a crazy notation, but maybe, just _maybe_, someone finally cared.

**Lol! So I'm finally learning how to write longer chapters (This is only a drabble, but still ;D). There is more detail in Lance's past that I will reveal in a later chapter/ drabble (If my calculations are correct, the ninth drabble, to be exact XD), but I figured that considering that this is the first time that Lance has EVER really explain himself to anyone, that it would only make since to make it vague. Well, I hope you enjoyed it! ;)**


	3. How I Know You

**Drabble 3**

The little five-year-old stared in awe at the buzzing world around her. In the sky, airships zoomed on their way carrying their bulging cargo, while business men walked to and fro on the ground below, bidding the morning's greeting to each soul that passed by along the way. The little girl giggled gleefully in sight of it all; market day had always been her favorite day of the week. Each sound was like a little instrument playing its joyous little tune, and each instrument was combined in order to create a magnificent symphony that tickled her ears with its music.

The trite party stopped that the same, typical playground they had arrived at countless times before. The King looked down at his small daughter, whose large eyes gleamed back at him with innocence in wet fascination.

"Now sweetheart, I want you to stay here while Daddy and the other men go off to do some work. If anything frightens you in the least, just call out, and one of the palace guards will be on their way to assist you.

The innocent girl nodded her head.

Her father lifted his foot, attempting to depart in the other direction, but failed. The little girl had embraced the aged man's leg, and was dangling high above the ground as he lifted the appendage. In a state of sudden surprise and confusion, the girl looked up blankly for a moment or so before breaking out in hysterical giggling. A smile cracked upon the old King's face and he removed the girl with two steady hands, wrapping her in his built arms.

"I love you, too, sweetie."

The little girl watched the spectacle as her father's majestic portrait melted away with the rising sun of the new day. Daddy was always so strong. Nothing would ever be able to tear him from her.

Nothing.

Then she heard it. Ilana turned around, attempting to trace the source of the tragic melody. Not far off, the little boy moaned out in pain, clutching his gut as the two shadows grew upon him.

"Please stop, it hurts!"

The two boys smirked crudely at each other before advancing on the poor child. All hope was swept from his portrait, but his face still remained firm.

One boy pulled the child up and held him, while the other took the swing. Lance moaned as he floated back to the ground below him, faintly conscious by the strength of his own knees. His little face scrunched up in disdain as he looked up at the cruel adversaries before him.

"I'm _not_ afraid of you."

The runt of the two cackled.

"Is that so?"

He yanked the boy up into the air high above, raising his fist in steady preparation for another blow. Lance closed his eyes and whimpered. This was it. It was the end of life as he knew it. And he hadn't even had then chance to eat the yummy meat sandwich Mommy had made him that morning. And oh, what a sad, cruel day it was when a mere, young boy was murdered before getting a chance to eat his homemade tuna fish sandwich. Oh, the _horror._

Yet, the bully never had a chance to wreck the poor boy's dream. A little fist clenched itself upon his wrist. He dropped the child and spun around, ready to attack, But his fist stopped its path in mid track. The older culprit's mouth dropped in shock and horror.

"Holy crap, dude, that's the Pr-"

The girl smiled with the artistry of a sinister look painted upon her.

"_Princess._"

The two boys were off and running without another moment's hesitation, their screams echoing in the distant wind like little bells. The girl smiled, giggling before turning to the boy with an outstretched hand. The boy smiled as he grasped it, his cheeks red with embarrassment.

He ran off before the princess had the chance to say a word to him. Ilana huffed in frustration at the young child's ignorance and turned her heel, ready to storm off.

"Meanie…"

But a small hand stopped the girl, grasping her's for a moment before letting go, and she turned to watch as the little boy ran off into the mid morning light. Ilana blushed. In it was a tuna fish sandwich.

Eleven years later, the sixteen year old boy stood staring through the window of a distant planet. Ilana may not have remembered, but they had met once before. And he would never forget it.

**To ****Mikura Moribund****: OMG! Someone finally got it! ;D I was so scared no one would get the joke! And thanks! :) **

**To ****Neopuff****: Lol it's okay, I'm just glad you did. And Thanksies! ^_^**

**To ****TrainxEve-Fan12****: *Blinks in shock* Really? COOL! XD Thanks! Yeah, I kinda have a fetish for deep characters/ plots (lol to the point that it's actually pretty bad XD)...but I'm really happy I was able to successfully do that with the second chapter! Thanks! :)**


	4. Fatal Boredom

**Drabble 4: Fatal Boredom**

Lance repeatedly tapped his fingers against the table, as boredom had overtaken the better part of him. It was Saturday morning and there was absolutely NOTHING to do. No rift gat opening to investigate, no fifty foot monsters to rage to death against-

Nothing.

Lance, however was used to the feeling. He had never been one to seek much excitement in life, and thus, the corporal had become rather accustomed to the typical feeling at hand. Ilana, on the other hand, was another story. Such silence was a magnificent form of tactic torture against the girl; Lance smiled to see it to plainly written upon her face, her feet humming upon the speed of their movement. But her recklessness had only made the girl more keenly alert, and she was able to spot the joyful form so smugly placed upon the boy's portrait before he was consciously able to conceal it.

"What?"

The boy, eager to make a game of it all, let the smirk persist. He had been forced to dwell with the princess to know that she was not one to stand for a failed response (let alone that of one of conscious ignorance) and thus, he did so.

Her seat bolted across the kitchen floor as her frustration beheld the best of her. _What _was this _kid's_ problem?

"ANSWER ME, CORPORAL! That's an order!"

Lance simply maintained his pose and expression, unwilling to alter it. He was ready to aim.

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO HARD T-"

Lance smirked, letting go of his fatal trigger.

"That's what she said."


	5. Daddy's Lies

**Drabble 5: Daddy's Lies**

Solomon stood staring repeatedly at the surveillance tapes he had acquired. If _only _he knew who they were then. If _only _he had known- he never would have shot that trigger at the Titan.

Did the soldier know who he was, who had shot at him? There was no telling in that.

He stared at the boy, forming the mechanic creature, rewinding, and forming it again. It had been years since he had seen that face, and how small it had been back then. But he would never forget the tears so horrifically marked upon it, begging him not to go. To him, it was a death trap, not a portal to another land.

To Lance, he had abandoned him.

Solomon had abandoned his son.

…

Ilana slowly opened the door. The princess knew that it was not wise to cross the corporal at such an hour, but their previous exchange had made her head swim with furious confusion. Lance had stated he had only _heard_ about his father's death, but now, today, he had claimed he had_ seen_ it. Why had he lied to her? She _trusted _him. She _believed him_…

Lance rubbed his eyes in half conscious frustration, attempting to adjust them to the new found light. He saw Ilana's distressed form, and his eyes softened.

"Ilana, is-"

The girl grabbed his shirt, which had been lying on the post of his bed, and recklessly threw it at his face.

"Put a shirt on, you bastard! So is that why you keep your shirt off at night? To make sure your not a cross dresser? Because you most certainly look like one!"

The young soldier, taken a back by her sudden accusation, blinked, attempting to understand the girl's motives. He reach up, grabbing the girls wrists as he attempted to bring the girl closer to comfort, but it only brewed her anger further, and she tore herself way.

"HOW COULD YOU? I trusted you Lance, I…."

Again the boy attempted to hold her, but she turned her back against him, pulling her wrists close to her small breast.

"You said that you had never seen your father die, that he was abusive-"

"But Ilana, he-"

"Then WHY was is your worst memory, tell me that! Why did it hurt you so much, if he was so cruel to you?"

Lance sighed.

"You'd never understand."

"TELL ME."

"Because sometimes, when you remember things worse than they are, that people were worse than they seemed, it makes you forget how much you really miss them. I know that if I keep telling myself that he was bad for long enough, and that seeing him die was all just a dream- maybe the pain will go away. Maybe THEN I'll understand why someone who claimed that they loved me so much had the audacity to kill himself in front of his own SON!"

Ilana turned around, attempting to reach for his shoulder in repent. But Lance had already moved away.

Lance walked out the door without another word. He had already said too much, and he wanted no more sympathy from her.


	6. Lists

**Drabble 6: Lists**

Octus looked at the two lists cleanly situated upon the kitchen table that morning. One was brightly colored, neatly situated in front of Ilana's seat; another, plainer in composition, was equally resting before Lance's. The two were as different as day and night, black and white, but if the duo had one thing in common, they were (for the most part) organized. Still waiting for them to awake, Octus gently picked up the simple slip of paper.

Customs to Take Note Of (Lance's List)

1) Halloween is a day when the majority of the world's children go around door to door demanding candy (or scaring the hell out of you...). Despite they're malicious actions and/ or demeanor, they are NOT Mutraddi Beasts! DO NOT attack them upon being forced to answer the door.  
2) It is apparently required that men wear only undergarments (aka "tighty-whities") while swimming.  
3) Fan girls and/ or guys are PARASITES. Always shower in the lockers WITH YOUR PANTS ON.  
3) Considering that I am six feet tall, apparently the average height for a humanoid on this planet is seven feet tall. And if you're actually important (or a jock on steroids)- ten.  
4) Saying that you're gay does NOT mean you're happy (and apparently long hair and large pectorals don't help either).  
5) Apparently my name references a weapon. How ironic...  
6) Being sent off to kill people as a military corporal at the age of 16 is illegal on this planet. I've become victim of child labor. Whoopie.

Octus rolled his eyes. For an adolescent with such "little emotion", Lance most certainly had his share of expressive emotions, let alone for society in general. He switched his gaze to that of the flowered slip and proceeded to read.

Things to Be Positive About (Ilana's List)

1) The sky is brighter on this side of the rift gate.  
2) Remember, you won't have to live with Lance forever. This is just a temporary state (Hey, at least you don't have to share a bedroom with him!).  
3) Here on this planet, there are books of law on practically EVERY device and moral code known to the humanoid kind (even TV remotes)! It's a shame that these inhabitants typically fail to read them...  
4) There is only one code of law that seems completely strange (if not, impractical) to me- "The Global Positioning System". Its methods are...interesting, as it always seems to find the most time consuming and/ or nonexistent path towards a destination.  
5) At least the cashier peasants care- they ALWAYS want me to have a good day.

Octus smiled. Ilana proved that sometimes when a humanoid was naive in a situation, it sometimes led to a more positive outcome. Well... usually.


	7. Shadows of the Wind Part One

**Drabble 7: Shadows of the Wind (Part One)**

Her eyes were gently closed upon thin lids of ice; Ilana's tears blended perfectly with the rain that drowned her domain of the dull roof, sturdy yet cold beside her. Her entire body shook in frightening vigor, unable to comprehend what pain had come to be.

He was gone.

Lost.

Shadows of the wind that should blow no more.

Lance would be frozen in this state for all eternity; forever he would be lost in the plague of this black coma. At least, that was what the physicians had said. But what did they know about the subject at hand? They were idiots- _all _of them. They knew nothing on the manner; they were but fragments of a backward civilization merely a farce to her majesty's own. Lance _would not _be cursed in such a way forever.

He couldn't be…

And for the first time in the young girl's life, her true feelings finally broke through the rotting doors of her consciousness. She…cared about him. But why did she feel this way? Lance was rarely one to neither have nor fake a positive attitude, and even less one so to listen to authority. He was like no corporal the princess had previously met; his mood and demeanor were dark and mysterious, yet…well intentioned. He was deeply scared by the horrors of a poor child's past.

But it made him real. And more so…

Ilana loved it.

She loved the way the moonlight kissed his newborn black eyes, and how ridiculously large they were in their nature. She love the way her name had been seemingly programmed straight into the front mark of the young corporal's mind, as it was his first response to the need of any given situation. She loved the intriguing look of his "puppy dog eyes" when he attempted to look innocent once caught and the quaint smile that he would rarely reveal (yet when he did, it was a vibrantly beautiful treasure to see). She loved how his tenancy to overprotect her intimidated her, and how his vigor in the manner always seemed to get their trio in deeper trouble than they had been in to begin with. But above all, Ilana loved the way Lance _truly_ cared about her, for he had let his emotions fly beyond the grasp of his mere (yet strict) duties.

Had he felt the same way?

Ilana buried her face into her small palms, trying to refine the pain boiling deep within. How she wished she could take it all back, prayed that even in his hopeless slumber, he would somehow absolve the broken princess. Lance had been given a rough life; it wasn't his fault, nor was it his choice. His previous lies meant nothing to her now; they were but that of a small orphan, just trying to seek the light beyond the raven of the horrid cave. If only he was here now. If only he could finally see that for the first time in years, someone cared about him. Somebody…

Loved him.

But he was gone.

Ilana had become the desiring victim of false lit incest. And he would never know.

…

It was twelve o'clock when the young princess had finally driven herself to the refined comforts of her own bed; it was twelve o'clock when she finally gave herself to sleep, despite the sorrow mixed inside. It was twelve o'clock when she angrily shoved her head beneath her pillow, trying to drown out the intimidating noise beside her.

It was twelve o'clock when the phone rang and twelve o'clock when Ilana realized she would be forced to answer it.


	8. Shadows of the Wind Part Two

**Drabble 8: Shadows of the Wind (Part II)**

It was twelve 'o clock when the phone rang, and Octus had no desire as to answer it.

Lance's fallen state had turned Ilana weak, and her mental state had left her in a physical one of even greater need in desperation. Octus had been conflicted by these solemn hours alongside her, but as he was merely a machine, and the extent to which his emotions could progress was rather limited. Unfortunately, lust was not among those limits. Ilana's disposition has made her too feeble for ordinary tasks and housework, thus she had purchased a mechanic vacuum in order so that she could take leave from her duties.

Octus stared with vigorous intensity as he watched the small machine twirl gracefully across the living room floor. It wandered this way and that, bumping against the walls here and there. And yet, in its own blindness, by sense alone was it able to remove even the smallest trace of dirt with pure perfection. Sadly, Octus had forgotten the name of the splendid creature. What had Ilana called it again? A Rumba or a Roamba? Or perhaps it was a Roomba?

A Roomba- that was it! A _Roomba_. And what a beautiful Roomba she was.

She was perfectly round, perfectly curved. Octus could feel his tongue brush around his lips in lustful desire as she danced below, ridding the world around him of its careless stain. She, so glorious in complexion, nearly wiped his system of the crisis at hand.

But the machine, miscalculating in its art, turned in the wrong direction. It bumped lazily into its master's foot. Octus moaned out in pure ecstasy.

Oh, such perfection…

…

Ilana could neither think nor breathe. The miracle of the call had stolen any remnants of air that had been resting at the seat of her lungs. He was alive.

He was _awake._

The princess cared not to change her sleeping garments; she cared not to lock the front door when she sped through it. She was even careless as to notify Octus of the news, who ripped his sights away from his newfound lover as she flew past. It took five hours to arrive at the bus stop ten feet away, twenty years for the ten minute bus ride getting there. Ilana had no strength left in her for patience, and she was all but confined to her seat. The girl's feet tapped frantically upon the floor below while her hands fidgeted amongst one another.

Beside her sat a small child. He was restlessly waiting like her (although he was more relaxed in his demeanor). He must have been five or six at most, for he was so petite that his legs dangled from the seat above as they swung in childish innocence. The boy took in a deep breath as he puffed his little chest out, filling his cheeks to the brim. His hands pushed the air back and forth inside his mouth. This was apparently meant to be some source of nonsensical entertainment.

"What's wong, Miz?"

Ilana drew her sights from the window to look at the small child. His eyes were brightly kissed by the morning sun, naïve to the harsh world the so closely surrounded him, and they easily allowed the girl's heart to melt. She let a trite smile cross her face as she looked down at her hands resting gently upon her lap, resting from their previous tremors.

"Oh- Nothing."

Her light response failed to alter the boy's expression. The youthful bird continued to look at her with gazing eyes, silently crying for his food.

Feed me. FEED ME.

Ilana faltered, moving around her seat in an awkward disposition. She was fully resentful to confession, yet intimidated by the youth's curiosity. Why did little children have to be so annoying…and cute…

The boy's emotion suddenly evolved, and a sunny smile beamed brightly back at her.

"Okay-kie."

He returned to his previous state of useless occupation- humming an obscure tune as he continued to pop his cheeks. Ilana giggled. This boy was so wonderful, so innocent. Had Lance once been this way? Could he have once been as pure and sweet as this tiny child beside her? Would the cruelties of reality one day shut him away like they had done to Lance?

Only time would tell.

…

The nurse looked at the boy with a sheer portrait of sorrowful pain. His eyes were drawn out in deep confusion, unable to comprehend. She knew that the girl was on her way; her joyous haste from the phone had blatantly stated so. But it would have been better if the nurse had never called.

She pitied the boy, having lost all memory, along with a mind in which to place noise upon his tongue. She let out a heartrending sigh as she gently placed a damp cloth to his head.

Lance wouldn't remember the girl.

**Okay, so thank you SOOOO much for all your comments. I take all of them to heart, and they mean a lot! ;D Okay, so according to plan there's at least one more part to this story before I get back to my regular drabbles! ;D**


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